today, i fantasized about running away for the first time in my whole life and it sounds terribly appealing only because i did so in the most childish sense, like i could maybe live in a hollowed tree or squat in an abandoned mansion or move in with someone wonderful and they would love me and spoil me and money and other worldly things would not be an issue because in daydreams i am wonderful, beautiful, unforgettable and an altogether perfect and graceful human being but completely disappearing is an art, something that needs to be fine-tuned and executed perfectly.
but in real life, soon it is over for always. everything will be clean. clean. clean. clean!
what have you done
